As things continue to roll and life continues to happen we have been talking about a lot of things. Mostly, about me and my job. I'm working on my 5th year here, and really it's a decent job. The hours are great for a mom with young kids, and the flexibility really can't be beat. One of the big downsides is that my mom is the director. I thought after 5 years, I would be able to shake that big, fat target on my back. Unfortunately, this doesn't appear true. It tends to still be the stigma that follows me around. Not to mention, just working with all women can become stressful all in itself....it just feels like I'm always in a pile of stress anymore. I find myself making it to the weekends completely worn out and drained. Don't get me wrong, I love working with the consumers, but I find myself reevaluating what *I* really want out of life. I was already thinking...then we took our Dave Ramsey FPU class about working in your strengths...and finding something you really LOVE TO DO at the end of the day....
Well, I've decided that working with children is really want I want to do. I think preparing kids for school & setting a good foundation for life is what I truly believe in. I'm tired of leaving my kids all day, every day. I have so may things I'd like to be doing with them. We've always talked about having one more too... Now that Helaena's here, that may not be the case... but I think my desire to have 3 probably comes from the 3 I lost in my early pregnancy difficulties. Anyway, before any more of my time slips away, I really want to find a way to be more actively involved with my kiddos. I never want to look back and regret that I didn't get to do something with them.
In doing FPU, looking over finances and especially when we looked at/considered the *COST* of me working, we realized what I was bringing home really wasn't that much after all. When I realized how much money I could *SAVE* just but staying home, it almost made me throw up! So I'm highly considering a daycare option. I didn't think I had much space, but my own provider assures me I do. And when I consider I only have to take on a couple kids to make up what I'm making now, it seems even more feasible. I have so many ideas! I have so many things I want to help my kids experience! And, I feel as though I could really excel if my JOB was to plan educational activities for kids. It really excites me to think this *may* be a possibility!
This won't be a fast decision, or something that happens even remotely close to "overnight" but I think with a little time, a little planning & and little prep, it really could be a good thing for me and my family. I think it could be better, not only financially, but be better for me personally. I think it would be very enjoyable and fulfilling.... so we shall see. I will start with a plan... Put some things on paper... Crunch some numbers... do a little dreaming...and a WHOLE LOT of praying!
Change is never easy. At least not for me. But sometimes change can be exactly what you've been looking for all along......
